Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Spam Amusement

I just got an email supposedly from someone who had seen my profile on a social networking site that I hadn't logged onto for so long, my account has been suspended there. Spam is often amusing but I really thought this was hilarious for some reason:

Hello my new friend:) My name's Anastasia.
I write to you because I want serious relations.
I saw your profile on dating site
Therefore I write to you now. I think, that you are good man and I hope,
that my heart does not deceive me. I search true relations for creation family.
I write to you and I hope, that you write to me also.
If you are interested, please write to me on my this e-mail.
I shall be glad, if you will answer me.
I shall wait your message with impatience.
your Anastasia:)

Of course, the requisite photo of an attractive female was attached. Also attached was the message "Email Marketing by iContact. Try it free!" Just as a tip for all those lonely Anastasias out there...probably a good idea to not include that last bit in your "marketing" email.

My reply, were I to send one:

Hello Anastasia my hot Russian babe that I have never seen before, I have known all my life we were destined to meet even though I did not know you existed until today. I know this because I seek professional nude jello wrestling partner for trade shows. Money is awesome but I have been out of work since my last partner dislocated her shoulder while performing the beautiful "Hiru-Kiru" body slam move in order to pin me. As I am large man I need partner with beefy arms to perform the more difficult moves and from your photo I know you will excel. Plus, I think you might be my soul mate or something. I look forward to our sparring sessions!

I kind of doubt I'd hear back from her if I were to send that reply though, so I guess she'll have to find some other sucker soul mate to fulfill her desires.


Stu said...

laughed I did as I read what you are writing in this pages of blog writing. I laugh out loud truly when you say these words in writing form. I not even want to be a mood of laughing style before coffee and waking up. you turn me on to laughing style with early in the morning word writing. thanks to you for that you are a man who is good to share.

Marvo said...

Spammers make a lot of money. You'd think they would be able to afford someone to proofread their stuff.

Chuck said...

Stu - glad I am that you enjoyed this writing of blog.

Marvo - I think it was probably intentionally spelled badly to make the sender seem like she is from Russia, when in actuality it's probably someone living in Ohio.